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Is it winter? Do you live in a cold and horrible place? Are you in one of the various stages of being a human popsicle?

Well, my friend, it's time to make a hot toddy.

STEP ONE: Boil some water. 

STEP TWO: While the water is boiling, gather your ingredients. (Don't you hate it when a recipe involves putting water on to boil, and the author doesn't mention that until Step Three or something? You could have already been DONE with that noise.)

Anyway, ingredients include lemon juice, a tea bag, honey and whiskey. 

Are you getting anxious because those ingredients weren't very specific? Guess what. It doesn't matter. Fresh lemon juice is easy and preferable, but the stuff out of the plastic bottle is OK in a pinch. Any plain or subtly spiced tea is OK, regardless of caffeine content. Your honey doesn't have to come from local bees.

This is a winter survival exercise, not Iron Chef America.

As for the hard stuff, any respectable bottle of mixing-quality brown liquor will do you just fine. I enjoy Rittenhouse or Old Overholt, because I don't like to spend more than $20 on whiskey that's mixed with hot tea and lemon juice. But that's just me.

STEP THREE: Coat the bottom of your mug -- oh, did I forget to mention that all you need is a mug? If you're about to make a hot toddy in a silly glass with a tiny handle, or something made of metal, or anything other than a plain old ceramic coffee mug, God help you, you are completely doomed -- with honey.

Add 1 oz. of whiskey (haha, just kidding. Add at least two.)

Get your tea bag ready to do its thing.

STEP FOUR: When the water boils, immediately pour into your magic mug. Let it steep for 3-5 minutes. Remove the tea bag.

STEP FIVE: Add lemon juice to taste. Don't even think about putting that stupid cinnamon stick in there, dummy.

STEP SIX: Drink. Revive. Repeat.

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